FORGIVING, FORGIVEN, FORGOTTEN
Written by Jenna Quentin
I squeezed the steering wheel, surprised at the strength of my spite. I had never even met Adeline, but it was enough that she was the ex-girlfriend of my fiancé. Just thinking about her gave me a migraine.
Although I’d always dreamed of being someone’s first love, I could only think of how God pardoned me of my own sins. The love and forgiveness that I felt towards my fiancé seemed to obliterate anything ugly. Except when I thought of Adeline, the time they had spent together and the pain she had caused him; then hatred welled up in me and shot a cancer ray to wherever she was. I realized that Adeline probably wasn’t a horrible person, but I didn’t want to believe it.
Forgiveness
To Forgive
I was thinking about her as I drove down a straight Kansas highway. I knew it was wrong not to forgive her. I turned off the radio, suddenly feeling like God was putting me in Adeline’s shoes to see her from her perspective. Why was I jealous when I had not only had the guy, but I had the Lord too; a precious relationship that I knew she lacked. I watched the windshield wipers, raindrops falling with my tears. It felt like they were washing away all those hard feelings, leaving only forgiveness.
I know that if I had guarded that bitterness, my new relationship would have been severely crippled. In letting go, I understood a bit better how God can forgive us for all our sins and mistakes. As a Perfect Holy Being, He can’t be contaminated by everything that comes with unforgiveness. Because of His love and mercy through Jesus, He doesn’t even hesitate to pardon us.
To be Forgiven
Recently, a friend was talking to me about her breakup. “Someday, we both might marry other people. I don’t want to be that girl from his past, you know? I just hope the man I marry someday will forgive me for the things I did in that relationship.”
I gulped when I realized she was in the position of the girl I had despised. I was privileged to be able to share the story of God’s forgiveness with my friend. Both the strength to forgive others and the power to be forgiven are something we find in the Lord. Colossians 3:13 explains this. “Bear with each other and forgive whatever grievances you may have against one another. Forgive as the Lord forgave you.”
To Forget
By writing this article, you can see I haven’t totally forgotten the ex-girlfriend. It can be a daily struggle to forget both my pardoned wrongdoings and the grievances of others. I am thankful that God is so wonderful and powerful He can forget and remove our sins from us as far as the east is from the west. (Psalm 103:12)
